Emotional Quotient

Reasons of increasing EQ

The emotional quotient (EQ) of a person has no relationship with the intelligence quotient (IQ). Many academically talented persons are unable to emotionally connect with others and inspire trust. In contrast, many emotionally talented persons have poor or average intelligence. 

People conduct business with those they trust, and with those they feel live and lead from a position of compassion. Emotional intelligence is crucial for success. 

People with high EQ understand that emotions may drive our behavior and influence people (both positively and adversely), and they understand how to regulate those emotions – both their own and those of others – especially when we are under pressure.

Many people want to increase EQ  for a number of reasons:

  • Trying to succeed in a leadership job;
  • Trying to fit in with a new company or new team; 
  • Trying to expand out of your network and create new friends or connections; 
  • Starting a new business and wanting to enhance your customer service are some of the most frequent motivations to work on your EQ.

Of course, many people desire to increase EQ simply to better understand themselves and the others they deal with. There are no disadvantages to being more emotionally intelligent, and the advantages can be enormous.

If you want to improve your emotional intelligence, know that you are not alone! Continue reading to find out how to achieve your objective. 

Emotional intelligence development is a continuous process. The path is unique to each individual. Nonetheless, Andrews believes that the following acts will help you improve your self-awareness, empathy, and social skills. 

Being more emotionally sensitive allows us to grow and get a deeper understanding of who we are, allowing us to connect with others more effectively and establish greater relationships. We recommend beginning with these first eight suggestions since they give a solid starting point for understanding the foundations of your emotional intelligence. 

These scientifically proven activities will not only improve your capacity to understand and work with your emotions, but will also provide you with the tools to help your customers, students, or workers increase EQ.

11 Methods to increase EQ

1. Utilize an assertive style of communicating

Assertive communication goes a long way toward earning respect without coming across as too aggressive or too passive. Emotionally intelligent people know how to communicate their opinions and needs in a direct way while still respecting others. 

2. Respond instead of reacting to conflict

During instances of conflict, emotional outbursts and feelings of anger are common. The emotionally intelligent person knows how to stay calm during stressful situations. They don't make impulsive decisions that can lead to even bigger problems. 

They understand that in times of conflict the goal is a resolution, and they make a conscious choice to focus on ensuring that their actions and words are in alignment with that. Learning how to handle your emotions and express them at the right time is an effective method to increase EQ.

3. Make use of your active listening abilities

Emotionally intelligent people listen for clarity in talks rather than simply waiting their turn to speak. Before answering, they make certain that they comprehend what is being stated. They are also aware of nonverbal cues in a conversation. This avoids misunderstandings, helps the listener to respond appropriately, and demonstrates respect for the person to whom they are speaking.

Pay attention to body language. When you listen to someone, do you cross your arms or look around? This tells others how you really feel about a situation, even if you are speaking a different message. Learning to read body language can be a real asset in a leadership role, because you’ll be better able to determine how someone truly feels. This gives you the opportunity to respond appropriately.

4. You should be motivated 

People that are emotionally intelligent are self-motivated, and their attitude encourages others. They establish objectives and are tenacious in the face of adversity. 

They will not be deterred by unpleasant comments or fleeting critiques. People with a high EQ will utilize those words to encourage themselves to develop. Use your flaws as a learning experience to help you increase EQ.

When starting a project, everyone has a primary motivation. The challenge is remembering this driving drive when hardship arises. All too frequently, individuals begin a project but fail to finish it because they lose motivation. Take the time to figure out what inspires you and utilize it to propel you over the finish line.

5. Develop strategies for maintaining a positive mindset 

Don't underestimate the influence of your attitude. If a person permits it, a bad attitude may readily infect others. People that are emotionally savvy are aware of the moods of individuals around them and adjust their attitude accordingly. 

They understand what they need to do to have a pleasant day and an optimistic attitude. This might involve eating a nutritious breakfast or lunch, praying or meditating during the day, or placing encouraging quotes near their workstation or computer.

Leaders that are emotionally intelligent lead with optimism. They look for the silver lining in the storm and see obstacles as learning opportunities. As leaders, they understand that their reactions will set the tone for how others respond to adversity.

6. Develop your self-awareness

People that are emotionally intelligent are self-aware and perceptive. They are conscious of their own emotions and how they influence people around them. They also pick up on the emotions and body language of others and utilize that knowledge to improve their communication abilities.

You can master self-awareness if you've mastered self-awareness and how your emotions function. This includes accepting responsibility for your own actions and well-being, as well as managing emotional outbursts. 

For example, to challenge yourself to a better EQ ,set a timetable, manage it, and adhere to it. It is important to develop and keep to a timetable if you want to perform things properly.

7. Be open to criticism

Being able to handle criticism is a crucial aspect of developing your emotional intelligence. Rather than being upset or defensive, individuals with high EQ take a few seconds to comprehend where the criticism is coming from, how it is hurting others or their own performance, and how they may constructively fix any concerns.

8. Understand what others are going through

People that are emotionally intelligent (high EQ) understand how to empathize. They recognize that empathy is a sign of emotional strength, not weakness. Empathy enables individuals to connect with others on a basic human level. It creates a space for individuals with opposing viewpoints and situations to appreciate and understand one another. 

Put yourself in someone else's shoes to increase your empathy. It's always simple to defend your own point of view. Emotionally savvy leaders are always concerned with how their actions and events affect others. Empathy communicates to people that you are concerned about their well-being and achievement, and that they are not alone in their struggle. They also express their support.

Furthermore, research suggests that reading literature with complex characters helps boost empathy. Reading stories from other people's points of view allows us to get insight into their ideas, motives, and behaviors, and may help you become more socially conscious. 

If you work hard to read books of all genres (genuine literature with life significance), you will see the profound human worth underlying each narrative that the writer conveys. If you are not a nerd, merely viewing excellent movies and learning the manners and forgiveness from the characters in the movie would be enough!

9. Make use of your leadership abilities 

People with a high EQ (emotional intelligence) have exceptional leadership abilities. They hold themselves to high standards and provide a good example for others to follow. They are self-starters with excellent decision-making and problem-solving abilities. This enables a higher and more productive level of performance in both life and work. 

Leaders have a significant role to play in every company: they must form, convey, and contribute to the vision of the organization. Naturally, emotional intelligence is quite beneficial in this job.

According to  Courtney E. Ackerman, MA, in particular, you need to learn to "say no" with vision-killing behaviors, including:

  • Treating people badly⁠—such as not showing people they care, forgetting to say thank you, not respecting people, not making people feel valued;
  • Living by the adage “Do as I say, not as I do,” and not setting good examples;
  • Focusing on too many things at once;
  • Pushing too hard on the task and forgetting the people;
  • Not giving clear direction;
  • Giving inconsistent direction;
  • Not taking responsibility for failure;
  • Focusing on the detail and forgetting to tell the “whys” or the big picture;
  • Showing little or no personal commitment to the vision;
  • Allowing people who aren’t performing the job to remain.

If you find yourself indulging in these activities on a regular basis, it is a strong sign that your leader's EQ is poor. Pay close attention to the three most common behaviors you engage in and commit to focus on decreasing or eliminating those habits altogether.

10. Request feedback 

It is all too easy to become caught up in a ‘opinion bubble' in today's hyper-connected society. This is a condition of being in which your own ideas are continually reinforced by others who hold similar beliefs. Take the time to study the other viewpoint and have your assumptions challenged (even if you still feel they are right). This will allow you to better comprehend others and be more open to fresh ideas.

Examine your self-perception by asking bosses, coworkers, friends, or family to assess your emotional intelligence. For example, inquire about how you handle tough situations, your adaptability or empathy, and/or your ability to handle disagreement. It may not always be what you want to hear, but it is frequently what you require.

11. Make an effort to be friendly and social

People that are emotionally intelligent come off as accessible. They grin and exude a pleasant energy. They employ suitable social skills dependent on their interaction with others around them. They have excellent interpersonal skills and understand how to communicate properly, whether vocal or nonverbal.

Many of these abilities may appear to be best suited for individuals who have a rudimentary understanding of human psychology. While inherently empathic persons are more likely to have high EQ abilities, they may be developed by anybody. People who are less empathic just need to practice being more self-aware and cognizant of how they connect with others. By following these steps, you'll be well on your way to improving your emotional intelligence.

Issues should be avoided to increase EQ

1. A dramatic event 

Emotionally intelligent individuals listen, provide solid advice, and show empathy to those in need, but they do not allow the lives and emotions of others to impact or control their own. Don't let unverified rumors make you change your mind. Even seemingly harmless stories can have an impact on your capacity to analyze and perceive human situations. 

2. Complaints 

Complaining suggests two things: first, that we are victims, and second, that our issues have no answers. An emotionally intelligent individual is unlikely to feel victimized, and even less likely to believe that a solution is beyond reach. So, rather than seeking for someone or anything to blame, they think creatively and resolve the problem in private. 

3. Dissatisfaction 

Cynical ideas can be stifled by emotionally competent persons. They recognize that negative ideas are just that: thoughts, and they rely on facts to draw conclusions, as well as the ability to mute or zone out any negativity.

4. Reminiscence of the past 

Those with high emotional intelligence choose to learn from their errors and choices, and instead of focusing on the past, they choose to live in the present.

5. Self-centeredness 

While a certain amount of selfishness is necessary to advance in life, too much can strain relationships and produce discord. Avoid being excessively selfish and consider the needs of others. 

6. Capitulating to peer pressure 

They don't feel obligated to do something just because everyone else is doing it if they don't want to. They think for themselves and never conform to satisfy others.

7. Being too critical 

Being excessively critical kills a person's morale faster than anything else. Remember that everyone is simply human and has the same goals (and limits) as you. Take the time to comprehend someone else before communicating the change you wish to see. 

You, too, can attain your full potential and achieve your goals by understanding, effectively implementing emotional intelligence and increasing your EQ.